Free of Bulimia

Click here to see her video.

 I have not been overweight in 31 years but I was in bondage to dieting and other bizarre behaviors. Our lives are like a journey. We are either going toward God or away from God. I am going to give the intimate details of my journey. Some will be shocked, other have stories equally painful. I have only in recent years been able to look back at the past and begin to even embrace it as the vehicle God used to teach me to know HIM.

Won’t it be wonderful when the Body of Christ, the church, is well enough that we can expose the dark shameful things to the Light of Christ. Healing then begins. I give all the glory to God Almighty – The One True and Living God – My miracle and deliverance was wrought by HIS STRONG RIGHT ARM.

Sandra’s Story, how God healed her…if your struggling do not embrace this as a way of life any longer, pray to break free and know God's power in your life.

   sherrills@touchnc.net 

I Childhood

A. Home where Christ was not known
B. Father – Alcoholic
C. Lacked security – affirmation – acceptance
D. Church on holidays
1. Class on John Wesley
2. Joined church at 12
3. Hated school weigh in by 10
4. Not chosen for teams until last
5. Legally blind – thick glasses
6. Teeth very crooked – no money for braces
until 17 7. Actively dieting by 12 or 13 – exercising some results but strong desire for food. It was used for comfort in my family. It was a way to show love.
8. Much shame. Always wore jackets or sweater
9. Parents moved to Columbia, SC when I was 18.
a. I lived in a rooming house – worked
b. Started taking diet pills – using laxatives. Later diuretics – thyroid medicine
c. Feast or famine – Often ate in secret. Never could understand.
d. Never dated much in school
e. Marriage
A. 20 met Sonne Herron
B. Looking for love and security. Thought found
C. Got pregnant – He left when I was 3 months along
D. Came back right before my son was born.
E. Got job, place for us to live
F. Mark was 3 months old, He left again
G. Never supported Mark or saw him.

III Before Christ
A. Alone with 3 month old child. Hardly the love and security I was seeking

B. Found myself turning to alcohol and diet pills

C. Struggled with weight

D. Lost weight after Mark was born

E. 1972 gained back to the heaviest 165 – Went to Weight Watchers. Steady loss – Rules strictly adhered to.
Exercised every day

IV Salvation
A. 3/23/73 Saved

B. Rex Humbard at home watching TV

C. Radical transformation – Instantly delivered from alcohol and amphetamines. I had been going to 2

Different doctors. I took medicine to get up and medicine to go to bed

D. Complete trust and assurance of salvation through Christ
E. Even struggles with weight subsided
F. Spirit instantly reborn – Soul needs to be restored
G. Radical for God
1. Divorced with 3 yrs. Old son
2. Learned to really depend on God in trust

V Desired Christian Home
A. Felt God answered prayer in Nov. 1976 – David
B. Married May 6, 1977. Mark was 7
1. David divorced with 6 yr old daughter in Denver, Colorado
C. Blended families are very difficult
1. Just the fact that we loved God and desired HIM to be first did not do away with brokenness of
our lives.
D. Intense Problems in marriage
E. Many problems with Mark
F. Many questions
1. Went to our church for help – they even thought it looked bleak

 G. When God’s people look for help anywhere other than the Cross – there is trouble

VI Journey Far From GOD
A. Went for counseling first with Pastor and his wife, then family, marriage

1979 Received promotion at work – many long hours at work
1980 Teeth straightened by crowning 4 front teeth
1981 Going to school – many hours – lost weight – very driven
1982 Taking many laxatives obsessed with weight
My life was so out of control this seemed an area I would control – no matter. The scale was my judge. Never quit going to church or loving God but could not figure out what had happened to my life. I was so driven.
1983 Had a tummy tuck. This actually made me worse. I went back to the surgeon and him cut away more. I had certainly worked on my exterior but on the inside I was so needy.

 1984 I went to ANAD. This did not help at all
1985 I was taking up to 45 laxatives at a time (15 of 3 different kinds working on 3 areas of the intestines) I made several trips to the emergency room to get IV fluid.

1986 I can remember a woman at work who was dying with cancer and her body was wasting away. I looked at her one day and I remember thinking “she doesn’t have to worry about her weight.” immediately I thought O, God where did that thought come from? Now I know it came from the pit of hell! I immediately asked the Lord to forgive me and realized how far off I was.
1987 I lost my appetite. I quit using laxatives excessively. I was always afraid there was no way my bowels could function normally so I took 3 senacots and 3 woman’s brand. I got down to 97 Lbs and I am 5’6” tall. It was in 1987 I began eating large amounts of food and spitting it out. I never could throw up without syrup of ipeca. I did this for the next 10 years.

1988 During the year I stayed 101-105. I knew I could not function below 100 so though I still felt fat I maintained that weight rigorously. There was always a need to be emptied out and a desire to be full full. This was a ritual.
1990 Much trouble with perfectionism/Ativan

1991 October my husband and I started attending Christian Life Center. Early 1992 I can remember going down to the altar and asking the Lord to please show me the way back to HIM. I had gone so far away.

VII Journey Toward GOD

A. Brought to a point of decision in March 1993
B. Decision to follow Christ wholeheartedly whatever the cost
C. God’s faithfulness
1. Prayed a prayer God continues to answer. That I would love HIM so much I would be compelled to tell others of HIM.
2. God said HE would restore the years the locusts had eaten away.
3. From that time forward many things would become clear and fall away by the hearing of the Word of God preached and taught under the anointing which breaks the yokes. I remember in 1994 thinking how sad it would be if when I die all that could be said at my funeral was “She was thin” She spent her whole life to be thin.
D. Grown more in knowledge and understanding of GOD and HIS WORD in the last 10 years than the 20 prior. Particularly the last 5 yrs. Things in perspective – somewhat free – no abuse – still used laxatives some.
VIII Intimacy

A. Turned 50 in Nov. 1997. GOD spoke to me and said it would be my year of Jubilee. I already felt so free Christ I could not imagine being freer.
B. In March 1998 I read a book by Gwen Shamblin – Weigh Down. The Lord spoke clearly that I would KNOW the TRUTH and THE TRUTH would set me free. I had been in such bondage to dieting even after I came back to the Lord in 1993.
C. God used the truth of the WORD OF GOD in this program to bring about deliverance from dieting.
D. For the first time since I was a child I could eat regular bread and small amounts of regular food and be satisfied. I could sense hunger and fullness as long as I kept my focus on GOD. I would leave Egypt and begin my trip across the desert with the LORD. God tests our hearts. Only HE knows our heart.
E. I knew GOD was calling for deeper trust and intimacy. He wanted me to only depend on HIM. No diuretics, no laxatives/no diet.
F. Laid diuretics down
G. Quit taking laxatives but used Metamusil
H. I knew in the natural my bowels would be ruined after 38 years of laxatives.
I. I think now I just was not able to quite let go at this point. More layers of deception needed to peel off.
J. I went through Weigh Down workshop twice
K. Cleansing Streams twice
L. These are the tools that God used in my life.
M. It is the WORD OF GOD which is JESUS CHRIST that brought deliverance. 1999 Bake bread made real to me – Likened to WORD OF GOD. So important in my life.
N. LOVE OF GOD
1. vision – saw myself after taking 45 laxatives, so many years earlier, I looked so lost and broken.
2. GOD whispered to me – I saw you and knew you and I loved you. My response was – Oh LORD, how could you? This changed my life profoundly. I felt so accepted and unconditionally loved

1. October 1999God allowed me to receive a book I had ordered the very day we left for the 2nd Cleansing Streams Retreat. “You Are Not What You Weigh” by Lisa Bevere. I read most of the book on the way to Raleigh. Another layer of deception when I realized who this person was that I never quite measured up to. Jesus is the express image of the Truth. Truth needs image for _expression, power and validation. The image of the lie is everywhere. It is the image of this present culture’s ideal woman. In herself she is nothing. It is what she represents that endangers us. She is deaf, dumb idol. How can she influence us so profoundly? Because we have not allowed God to influence us so profoundly. The image we behold is the image we become. An idol is anything we draw strength from or give your strength to. All lasting liberation, healing or change begins with inward transformation. God is calling us to radical transformation. God does not want us fulfilled through self-image but fulfilled through HIM.
Week of Feb. 20 2000
A. Tremendous week in Lord. Particulary Friday February 25, 2000. While listening to tapes from conference Aug. 1999 in Van Nys, CA. James Robinson said something that the Lord used to show me a truth. Anytime we receive revelation from God enemy will try to tell us how to do it in natural. Wait on God.
B. God had said HE would give me bowels of mercy and compassion. I knew what HE meant. I knew what HE meant but I had allowed world system and enemy to lead me to compromise what I believed God was saying. I want to only be full of GOD. All other fullness comes from enemy and caters to my flesh and leads to my destruction.
C. God asked me again to give it to HIM to take care of - Senokot. D. I have not had any Senokot or Metemusil since February 24, 2000 2/27/2000 Monday – Several small bowel movements today and regular. Went to Dr. on Monday Had not weighed in 3 weeks Weighed 119 with clothes on. It is hard to explain but something rose up in me. I rebuked this imagination or image that rose up against the knowledge of GOD. Home – Got on scales and cast down as an idol in my life. I had already done this. But it needed to be done after God healed my bowels.
Focus on God – Decision
Renew mind daily with Word of God
Several more occasions during week to battle
Week of Feb. 20 2000- God told me again He wanted me to trust him with my bowels. He had told me He wanted to give me bowels of mercy and compassion. God gave me the courage to trust Him and I have not had a single laxative since Feb. 25 2000. He has completely healed my bowels and set me free. God has continued to deliver me by renewing of my mind. Truly, there was a depth and strength to this stronghold and there are many factors that only Holy Spirit, our great counselor can lead us through. Even though I had been free from laxatives and dieting I still have dealt with some need that food brought and filled that only God could meet. I will go into details later but on Sunday July 20, 2003 he pulled out the last root of insecurity. I can truely say the need for any comfort from food is gone. I have prayed for an undivided heart to fear the Lord for so long knowing that only HE could work this through me as I was able to yield to HIM. I have actively been pursuing the enemy of my soul for the last 5 years and God had told me I would be whole in HIM before I moved to Bryson City, NC to answer HIS call to work with Native Americans. I am a walking miracle and testimony of the all sufficiency of our GOD to deliver. All glory to JESUS, who is my life. Without HIM I have no life. God has also healed my marriage and my husband and I renewed our wedding vows May 2002. We are truly one in HIM.
Blessings to all,
Sandra